5 Things FAM Users Say To Their Partners: The Roses Of Fertility Awareness

As 2013 comes to an end, SuzyKnew brings you more on what to expect when using the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) or natural birth control:

1. “What was my temperature?” While this may be something you ask your partner when you suspect a fever, a FAM-er asks this question everyday. Temperature is the most well known sign of ovulation (when an egg drops), and if the temperature shifts up, watch out! You could get pregnant. The reason we ask our PARTNERS is because in FAM, our partners can share the responsibility of tracking our fertility. One of the main ways they do this is by taking our temperature for us while we’re still nestled in bed.

2.  “Does this look like lotion or cement?” Another sign that you may be close to ovulating can be found your panties. By looking at the consistency of your cervical fluid, or the liquid stuff you see in your underwear (it’s the equivalent of semen for women, minus the sperm). At the beginning of your cycle after you finish your period, your cervical fluid may be kind of sticky and dry, like cement. Later in your cycle you may notice your fluid to feel and look more like lotion – this means you’re close to ovulation! Use the condom!

3. “I can’t today. I feel too wet.” While I imagine that a statement like this could bring a grown man to tears, it’s something we FAM-ers may say at least once a month! When we’re close to ovulating, our fluid changes from lotion-y to slippery and wet feeling (our bodies try to help the little swimmers out). This wet feeling is different from the one you feel when you’re turned on. This one stays even when you’re mad at him!

4. “I’m on my period! Let’s do it.” While many women (and men) can be grossed out having period sex (or, as I saw it called in a book, “Surfing the Crimson Wave”), it’s actually a great time to do have all the unbarrier-ed sex and not worry about pregnancy! According to Toni, you are safe to have sex the first 5 days of your cycle if you had a temperature shift about 2 weeks prior. What does that mean? Bust out the shower sex.

5. “I’ll join you in shower after I check out my cervix!” The last sign of where you are in your cycle is checking out the position of your cervix. Never felt your cervix, you say? Let the lovely people at the Beautiful Cervix Project help you get started. When your cervix is hard, low, and closed you’re less likely to get pregnant than when it’s higher, softer, and slightly open. This sign, is hardly ever used on it’s own for birth control, but rather just helps you confirm what you’re seeing with your temperature and fluid. I always check mine right before I jump in the shower. I’m naked then anyway, right?

3 responses on “5 Things FAM Users Say To Their Partners: The Roses Of Fertility Awareness

  1. Kasha

    What does that mean? Bust out the shower sex…or the softcups, diaphragms, soft tampons, sponges…or just go at it, it’s only blood! Plus sex during menstruation is more enjoyable.

  2. Amanda

    I agree with most of the statements here and am a huge advocate of FAM. The only one I disagree with is the one about having sex on your period. In terms of fertility awareness it’s great because you obviously won’t get pregnant, but from an overall health perspective it’s not great for you to do. When you’re on your period there is a natural flow down and outwards (menstrual blood exiting your body), and when you have sex you are sending energy back upwards which goes against the natural order in the body. Once and a while is ok, but I wouldn’t make a habit of it.