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Melania’s Sista’ Envy

Ladies, Melania’s got Sista’ envy, and we know it.

Melania copied Michelle’s speech for her own first speech. Remember that? And now for her first official visit to the UK, Melania dressed just like Meghan. Yass… she dressed like the Duchess of Sussex! Vanity Fair and others have pointed this out.

Ok, Miss Melania isn’t rockin’ the dress like Sista’ Meghan,  but she’s tryin’.

Photo credit: Vanity Fair

Well, they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Is Melania saluting Black Girl magic?  Does she admire Black women and other women of color?

But, between flattery and admiration there often flows a river of contempt.

Ladies, stay tuned… SuzyKnew! will stay on the case to find out which of these sayings is true, as we continue to bring you latest news on sexual and reproductive health issues that affects us

 

 

Melania’s Got Sista’ Envy

Ladies, Melania’s got Sista’ envy, and we know it.

Melania copied Michelle’s speech for her own first speech. Remember that? And now for her first official visit to the UK, Melania dressed just like Meghan. Yass… she dressed like the Duchess of Sussex! Vanity Fair and others have pointed this out.

Ok, Miss Melania isn’t rockin’ the dress like Sista’ Meghan,  but she’s tryin’.

Photo credit: Vanity Fair

Well, they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Is Melania saluting Black Girl magic?  Does she admire Black women and other women of color?

But, between flattery and admiration there often flows a river of contempt.

Ladies, stay tuned… SuzyKnew! will stay on the case to find out which of these sayings is true, as we continue to bring you latest news on sexual and reproductive health issues that affects us

 

 

Dr. Drai: Why You Should Have Sex On A Daily Basis

Hi #GYNEGirls! It’s me Dr. Drai…. Are you in a relationship? If you are, are you pleased with the frequency of intimacy? If you would like to be more sexually active with your partner, you will want to set a goal for yourself. Share that goal with your partner. The two of you can make a game out of trying to achieve. To get you started, a great goal to have is having sex on a daily basis. YASSS!

Being intimate on a daily basis? Right now, you are either thinking two things. First, you may be thinking “we already do that!” If so, good for you. You officially have a happy and healthy sex life. On the other, you may be thinking “no way, there is no time.” If that is the case, know it isn’t true. You may be surprised just how many couples out there have sexual relations on a daily basis. It is also important to note that these couples often have the healthiest and happiest relationships of all.

As for why you should set the goal of being intimate on a daily basis, you will find that dong so is healthy for your relationship. As previously stated, couples who have intimacy on a daily basis often have the healthiest relationships. When in a serious relationship, intimacy is important. Yes, your relationship should not be based on sex, but it is a huge component of it. Connecting intimately shows your partner that you truly love them. So why not take steps to express your love everyday?

Your chances of experimenting are also likely to increase when you have sexual relations on a daily basis. Why? Because if you have sex daily, you may honestly get bored with that you are doing. However, instead of opting to reduce the frequency of intimacy, many couples decide to experiment instead. This is something that may provide you with excitement or a source of motivation. This experimentation may involve the use of sex toys, pornographic videos, new positions, and role playing.

Sex is also good for your health. That is just another one of the many reasons why you may want to set a daily goal. Those who have healthy sex lives are less likely to suffer from stress and depression. This may improve your relationship by limiting the amount of disagreements you and your partner have. It is also important to note that sex burns calories. What could be better than working to lose weight while being adventurous with the man or woman you love?

The above mentioned information was designed for men and women who are in exclusive relationships, such as a marriage. If you are not involved with anyone right now, daily sex may not be a wise idea for you. This is because you may end up with a different partner each and every night. A s fun and as exciting as this may sound, you may end up putting your health at risk. Remember that your risk of developing a sexually transmitted disease increases with each additional sex partner you have.

In conclusion, having sex on a daily basis is a good idea. If you aren’t already having daily sex, it may be a wise idea to set the goal. You may be surprised just how much daily, intense intimacy can help to improve your relationship. For a free copy of my latest book “20 Things You May Not Know About The Vagina” go to www.drdrai.com/vagina. Until next time… it’s Dr. Drai.

What To Expect Getting An Abortion

In light of the news that Justice Kennedy is retiring from the U.S. Supreme Court, which puts in question Roe vs. Wade, or American women’s access to abortion, SuzyKnew! is bringing you the experience of women who have had an abortion.

YouTube has numerous videos made by women who tell their abortion story.  Many are judgmental. The video below is judgement-free and is by a young Sista’ who talks about her experience with both abortion pills and surgical abortion, to prepare women who have made the decision to have an abortion.

 

The Real Meaning Behind Melania’s Message On Her $39 Zara Jacket

Ladies, SuzyKnew! is here to bring you the real news about the first lady – straight, with no chaser. Everyone is asking why Melania went off to Texas to visit migrant children separated from their families at the border wearing a $39 jacket from Zara with graffiti proclaiming “I really don’t care, do u?” What does the writing mean? Why would Melania wear something so insensitive (and so low-priced and proletarian?), making her look like she doesn’t care about the children? Wasn’t it Melania (and Ivanka) who finally convinced The Donald to change his policy around separating children from parents caught trying to cross the border illegally? Isn’t Melania the one who’s been talking about protecting children from cyberbulling, promoting #BeBest and all?

Well, SuzyKnew! has a few thoughts about the message on Melania’s jacket. So, let’s get started. You have to keep in mind that Melania is all about Melania. Nothing else. Sure, she says she has a heart for children. But, Melania’s primary focus is on herself, what she’s going through and what she’s feeling. This has been made clear many times like when she showed up separately from her husband at his first state of the union dressed in Hillary-Clinton white, after finding out her husband had slept with porn star, Stormy. Clearly, Melania wasn’t thinking about how to make her husband feel good. Or, when she constantly pushes her husband’s hand away when he reaches out to her in public.

The message on the $39 Zara jacket isn’t about how Melania feels about the unaccompanied children locked up in jail-like cells.

  1. The message is about Melania being tired of her husband’s overbearing ways. There was definitely some spat that took place between Melania and her husband that prompted Melania to don a jacket like this so that she could announce her feelings to him and the world.  Did The Donald leave the toilet seat up for the 100th time and when he tried to apologize to his fair lady, she gave him a sharp look and donned the jacket announcing she really doesn’t care, and knows he doesn’t either.  Or, maybe, Trump told his wife not to go down to the border with all the reporters and stir up trouble, giving his critics ammunition against his policies by pointing out that even his wife is against him. And, in response, Melania defiantly told him she was definitely going to Texas to visit the kids whether he liked it or not, and she doesn’t care what he thinks and doesn’t believe he really cares either. And after spitting this out in his face, Melania whipped out the jacket and ran out the door to catch her plane.
  2. Melania is expressing her feelings about her marriage. Stormy put a hurtin on the first couple. But, who doesn’t love Stormy? We love Stormy! But, of course, we know Melania doesn’t. And she hates that awful Karen McDougal, who talks like she’s Miss America and poses nude in Playboy and then says she had to break up with Melania’s husband because her mother wouldn’t like her dating a married man (but her mother wouldn’t mind all her nude photo shoots, right- ?!)  How embarrassing for the first lady to go through all these scandals! So public.  And the only way to take a break is to stay away from public events and the media, but who can do that forever? SuzyKnew! is sure Melania told Donald she’s upset that he’s disrespecting their marriage in such a public way and she’d like to be more visible and show support for things she cares about like vulnerable children, but her marriage is in such a wreck she doesn’t know what to do. We’re also betting that when The Donald heard this he told Melania, “Look. You’re a washed up model who’s getting up there in age and I’m the President. I don’t need you making scenes by pushing my hand away when I try be affectionate and show the American people what a good husband I am or now going down there to see those illegal children. Stay home where you belong and support me.”  After hearing this, Melania shouted, “Donald, this presidency stuff is wrecking our marriage! But, I’m so over it.” And, at that Ladies, Melania put on her jacket telling her husband, “I really don’t care, do u?” and ran out the door.
  3. The message is for all the people who keep asking about her whereabouts and why she isn’t behaving like a normal first lady.  We all know Melania isn’t into being the first lady. She’s like never around and frequently looks sullen and unhappy. We also know that Melania was a model and has a very public image, but, she is also very private, especially post election.  So, maybe the message is really for us, the American people, and the “fake” media as The Donald tried to put out there in his tweets. Melania is trying to say she doesn’t care what people are saying about her or where she does or doesn’t go.
  4. Or maybe, Melania just doesn’t care… about the children, about her husband, about the media, the country or anything for that matter…  And, if this is the case, we, the American people, really should care.

 

Photo credits: Getty Images

 

Dr. Drai: How To Eat Your Way To Better Sexual Health

Hi #GYNEGirls! It’s me Dr. Drai…. What do grapes, oysters, and chocolates have in common? Well, aside from being food, they’re all supposedly aphrodisiacs. For the unaware, an aphrodisiac is basically a food or drug that has effects on sexual health, typically by either making it easier to become sexually aroused or by boosting sexual performance. Now, while all of the above foods have been known to release varying levels of endorphins into the body in the same way sex does, they are not necessarily all that beneficial to one’s sexual health. Of course, that doesn’t mean that food and meals don’t play a part in a person’s sex life because there’s quite a bit of scientific data saying that it does.

Working from the top and going down, the brain is the core of all activity that concerns the body, including sexual functions. Replacing full meals with snacks or junk food can seriously decrease the usual flow of nutrients to the brain, making it less capable of processing all the stimuli and emotions involved in sexual activity. In short, the lack of nutrients can dampen someone’s ability to enjoy sexual intercourse.
Moving a little lower, it makes sense that sexual health is connected to the overall state of the circulatory system. Blood circulation is necessary not only for the proper functioning of internal organs but also for ensuring the functions of the male and female reproductive organs. So, if the heart or the blood vessels are in poor condition, it also has a detrimental effect on the body’s ability to perform properly during sexual intercourse. Increased or improved blood flow helps increase the sensitivity to stimuli of the appropriate organs and heightens the level of physical endurance during intercourse.

For more specific help regarding food and sexual health, some might want to look into Nitric Oxide, which is not to be confused with Nitrous Oxide. Nitric Oxide (NO) is the substance found on the lining of the internal workings of male and female genitalia. Without it, men can’t obtain or sustain an erection (even with proper blood flow), while women are unable to become lubricated, regardless of what stimulation is put in there. Some doctors suggest that the ingestion of arginine, another substance which encourages the body to produce NO. Arginine helps improve circulation and sexual health. Arginine is typically found in walnuts, almonds, and salmon.

Antioxidants, particularly the ones that are chemically abundant in dark chocolate, also have positive effects on sexual performance and health. Antioxidants are linked to improved blood circulation, something that has already been mentioned as being beneficial to sex. Other good sources include tomatoes, spinach, garlic, red peppers, and red grapes. However, some point out that chocolate somehow also increases desire along with improving performance, likely because certain components in chocolate can improve circulation.

Most people would cast the notion of eating to improve sexual health and performance as a myth, much like how deodorants supposedly cause breast cancer. However, the medical reality is that some foods can improve the systems of the body that are involved in sexual functions. For example, foods that improve circulation inevitably improve sexual endurance. I gotta go. Until next time… it’s Dr. Drai. Remember to download a FREE copy of my latest book “20 Things You May Not Know About The Vagina.” Just go here —>>> www.drdrai.com/vagina.

Melania: A Part-Time First Lady And Independent Woman?

I have a close friend I often refer to as my part-time man. We’ve been close for many years but live in different cities, keep our own schedules and feel no obligation to show up for one another’s important events.  We are not, after all, husband and wife, or even “partners.” Indeed, I am a single, independent woman.

Which brings me to Melania.

Melania seems almost as single and independent as me. (You go, Girl!) Watching her – and the Donald – it is clear Melania isn’t a fulltime first lady. She is not present all the time or “on” for the American people – or her husband. Melania is part-time.

Clearly, Melania got off to a slow start as first lady. She stayed in New York for months after the Donald took office. Rumor has it she cried when he won.  Ever since arriving in DC, her public appearances have been sporadic.  Until recently, it had been nearly a month since Melania had been seen in public.  Apparently, she’s been having some liver problems. Sure. We understand. And of course, who can find fault with her #BeBest campaign (although the wording could have been better). I mean who likes cyber bulling? But, overall, Melania’s heart really isn’t into this first lady thing, is it?

She seems to prefer chillin’ at Mar-a-Lago. Going down when she feels like it.

Melania attends important events such as her husband’s State of Union address separately, like she’s single – like me. She often denies her husband the right to hold her hand in public (probably pretty emasculating for the Donald…). My friend and I don’t hold hands either – because it’s not like that. And, now we hear Melania doesn’t plan on attending the upcoming G-7 event. Is that optional? I mean – I thought married women – and especially the first lady – had to do these kind of things. I mean I could understand if Melania was a Supreme Court Justice, a general surgeon or rocket scientist and her schedule just wouldn’t allow for that kind of travel. But, she’s not.

Which brings me to another thing: Melania gets all her fancy housing and clothing paid for. We know she’s got some sort of product line going on, but it seems like it takes a lot more money than what comes in from that side gig to keep Melania living in the style she does.  This is where Melania and I are very different. I definitely work for everything I have. Everything you see – and some might argue it’s a lot – I worked for. No man bought me anything I have. (Ok, I do drive my father’s old Benz…) But, you get my point.

Simply put: Melania leads a mostly separate, independent life from the President. Her lifestyle is more like a kept woman than a married one, let alone a first lady.

And, ladies, we all know if Michelle or Hillary (who also had a cheating husband) pulled something like this – not showing up to important events, not allowing their husbands to show them gentle affection in public – we wouldn’t hear the end of it from the Right. And, because those on the Left don’t want to appear “judgmental” or not allowing the First Spouse to be his or her own person, they don’t say anything.  And, therefore Melania – and Donald – get away with this.

But, don’t the American people deserve better? Maybe we want to be a little more “traditional” and retro here and demand that our First Lady show up at events with the President and enter as a couple. I mean… shoot, maybe she should step aside and let another lady get up there and be First Lady fulltime.

Is this the new model for America’s First Lady? A person who’s not really into being the president’s partner but more into living their own life on their own terms? Very radical and progressive – perhaps. But, does Melania’s model  provide the leadership we need in “coupledom,” American love and family values?  The first couple seems as divided as the nation – not exactly a soothing balm in these trying times. Obviously, the Donald is having as hard of a time unifying his marriage as he is in unifying the country. Showing love to either hasn’t been his forte. I know I’m digressing here.

Ladies, don’t mistake independence for not doing your job – fulltime.

Photo credits: Getty images

 

Skills For Healthy A Romantic Relationship

Yes, ladies, there are lots of TED talks out there.  But, SuzyKnew! goes through them to identify the ones worth listening to.  Here’s a TED talk on how to build skills for a healthy romantic relationship that got over 1.5 million views. Given by Joanne Davilla, PhD, a professor of psychology and the Director of Clinical Training in the Department of Psychology at Stony Brook University, the talk provides helpful points in a focused and concise format.

Click here for more about skills for a healthy relationship.

 

Be Your Own Duchess Of Sussex

With all the royal wedding hype, what Black woman doesn’t want to be a princess or treated like a queen these days? Now that we have a Black duchess in the British royal family, shouldn’t we all want to be royal?

Here are a few simple steps you can take to feel regal.

  1. Add a tiara to your outfits
    Apparently, people were shocked to see Meghan wearing Queen Mary’s diamond tiara bandeau. There were so many tiaras she could have gone with. But, you can get your inner princess on and wear your tiara when the occasion calls for it. Like International Tiara Day, May 24.Or, to your high school prom. Or, your wedding. But, if those days are over, don’t let the opportunity for your inner princess to shine pass you by. Tiaras are still de rigeur these days. Girls and  women wear them on their birthdays and special occasions. Feel royal like Meghan and wear a tiara for your special occasion.
  2. Get your own coat of arms – Now that the wedding is over, we are hearing nonstop about the coat of arms that is being designed for Meaghan.  Why not get your own coat of arms? Click here and enter your last name and depending on your name you will find your family’s coat of arms (or the slave owning family’s coat of arms, but, hey – miscegenation is real…) If your family name doesn’t have a coat of arms, no worries. You can always petition the College of Arms for one. There are no fixed criteria of eligibility, so go for it.
  3. Get a diamond ring like Meghan’s – Don’t let the fact you’re already married or aren’t planning on getting married anytime soon get in your way. Buy a replica or inspired ring like the royal one and make it your “right-hand ring.” Brilliant Earth sells the authentic three-stone diamond ring style worn by Meghan or let’s you find similar ones. You can also find affordable imitations for under $20 on Amazon.com, or ebay, letting you enjoy the moment but not feel compelled to keep wearing an expensive diamond ring.  
    4. Handle chaos and controversy with poise and grace – Of course, the true mark of a royal woman is her ability to remain poised under pressure. Many people remarked on how well Meaghan handled the gossip and scandals – particularly around her family – that emerged after she became engaged to Prince Harry.  There will always be haters and people who want to rain on your parade. When things go wrong and chaos reins,  hold your head high like a queen and keep calm and carry on!

For more on Black women royals read Madame Noire’s Meghan Markle isn’t alone: 9 Black women who married royals.

Abortion Trends – Savita’s Revenge Or Remorse?

In 2012, SuzyKnew! posted an article about women who think they will never need an abortion and then find themselves in a situation like Savita Halappanavar, the Irish woman of Indian desent who died from pregnancy complications when an Irish hospital refused to give her an abortion. Last week, six years after Savita’s death, Ireland voted to overturn the country’s ban on abortion, which was one of the strictest in the world.

(Photo courtesy of UK Daily Mail)

Since a large number of women think they will never need an abortion they aren’t prepared for one.  Many women and their families assume that their health care provider, close confidents and their country’s laws will support them if they ever found themselves in a situation like Savita did. But, this may not be true.

What are abortion laws around the world? Here they are in 5 minutes (source)

Although a large majority of countries allow abortions to save a woman’s life, few countries provide real access to safe abortion. Like, Savita, women are dying around the world. #MeToo?

Looking at the map above, North America, including the U.S., has the safest abortions of all regions. But, under the Trump Administration, access to safe abortion is under threat. From Trump’s recent proposal to defund Planned Parenthood, which is an important source of abortions for low-income women, to efforts to reduce access to family planning and birth control and of course who can forget Trump’s missteps during his campaign when he said women who have abortions should be punished (go to jail?), could American women start ending up like Savita?

Have any of Trump’s former lovers found themselves needing an abortion? Maybe the Donald provided them the financial – if not the emotional support they needed to have an abortion. Did these women have the option to keep their Baby Donald if they decided they didn’t want an abortion? Or not?

Ireland’s overturning its ban on abortion and the #MeToo movement against the backdrop of rising populism across the U.S. and Europe and backlash against women are dual trends that could spell hope or disaster for women worldwide.

See the Guttmacher Institute’s Fact Sheet on abortions worldwide for more information