Author Archives: SuzyKnew!

About SuzyKnew!

SuzyKnew! is dedicated to improving the sexual and reproductive health and sexual pleasure of women of color.

Birth Control Detox: 5 Supplements For Going Off The Pill – By Holly Grigg-Spall

These supplements can help with your transition off hormonal contraceptives and bring your period back

The birth control pill depletes nutrients and minerals in your body via a number of different mechanisms. The longer you’re on hormonal birth control, the more nutrient deficient you can become as the effects are cumulative and insidious. The pill has a similar impact to antibiotics on your gut health or microbiome, preventing proper absorption of the vitamins you do take in via your diet or supplements while still on the pill. Many medications deplete nutrients (there’s even a term for it – Drug-Induced Nutrient Depletion), but the pill has a more powerful impact than most, partly because of how it works to suppress your body’s hormone cycle, and partly because it is often taken for years or even decades by otherwise healthy women.

When you’re coming off the birth control pill, your body needs nutrients and minerals in order to manufacture and process its own hormones again. On hormonal birth control, your body is prevented from producing its own hormones and, instead, relies on the hormone replacement of the pill. So when going off these medications, you need to give your body some support to make sure your period returns, your cycles are regular, and you avoid symptoms like acne or cramps.

We’ve turned to our favorite women’s health coaches and hormone experts to source the right supplements to take for your transition off the birth control pill. Naturopath Dr. Lara Briden and women’s health coach Nicole Jardim both provide support to women in making the switch from hormonal to hormone-free contraception.

1. Vitexa powerful herb that can be used post-pill to help your body make hormones again, bring back your period, and regulate your cycle. It’s best to see if your cycle returns of its own accord before employing this supplement, however. If you decide to use Vitex, limit the time you take this herb to three to six months maximum, and then see how your hormones do without it.

2. Probiotics – the affect of the birth control pill on the microbiome, or your gut, can create an imbalance of bad to good bacteria. More and more research is showing that gut health is linked to many systems – like strength of immunity and mental health. As you may know, the birth control pill has been linked to Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Crohn’s Disease, and the development of food sensitivities and allergies. You can take a probiotic supplement or eat a supplementary dose of kimchi or sauerkraut everyday.

3. Magnesium – most women are magnesium-deficient, it’s a mineral that is easily depleted by common lifestyle choices like drinking coffee, and taking the pill can exacerbate this problem. Magnesium is an essential building block for making hormones, but it’s not easy to supplement – try a good quality magnesium oil, epsom salts, or a drinking powder, rather than a regular supplement pill and see what dosage suits you.

4. DIM – many women going off the pill find themselves with estrogen overload or estrogen dominance, wherein they are deficient in progesterone and their estrogen levels are much higher, causing symptoms from weight gain to irregular cycles. DIM (diindolylmethane) is a nutrient found in leafy greens from kale to chard, but in supplement form it is more potent. It helps to eliminate and eradicate excess estrogen that comes from our external environment (endocrine disruptors in plastics, pesticides, shampoos) and from internal imbalance issues. DIM is especially helpful for avoiding post-pill acne.

5. B Complex – B vitamins are some of the most aggressively depleted by the birth control pill.This is one of the root causes behind the depression and anxiety some women can experience while using these medications. This is why some pharamaceutical companies have experimented with adding B vitamins and folic acid to oral contraceptives (despite the fact that as absorption channels are compromized by the pill, this would not make a significant difference). Supplementing with a good quality B complex, plus additional B6 and B12, will support your body during the transition off the pill.

You can now purchase Dr. Lara Briden’s book “Period Repair Manual” direct from the Daysy store. Nicole Jardim’s online support program for going off the pill is now available for just $46 in our store, too, when you also purchase a Daysy. If you already have a Daysy, you can call our customer service line to sign up for the program at the same rate.

Photo courtesy of Nootriment.com

 Holly Grigg-Spall – Marketing Consultant and Blog Editor – When she came off the birth control pill after 10 years in 2009, Holly decided to write a blog about the experience. That blog became a series of articles, and then book, “Sweetening the Pill,” which then inspired a feature documentary, currently in production and executive produced by Ricki Lake. She is a fertility awareness and body literacy advocate and educator, a Daysy enthusiast, and excited to help more women come off the birth control pill and find a natural, effective alternative. Click here to sign up for the Daysy newsletter . holly.grigg-spall@valley-electronics.com

Making 2017 Amazing For You – By Lillian Ogbogoh

I know we are almost at the end of the first month of  2017, and most would think that this should have gone out at the start of the year from day 1.  I say Pish posh, we are at the start of the year and post-holiday the best thing would be to catch our breath and pause. So let’s recap, 2016 was an interesting year, yes we will use the word interesting shaking my head not really, we are in a world sans Prince, Bowie and George Michael…

Secondly, I was waiting to see if the world went up in smoke after the 20th of January, and I am happy to declare that there were no four horsemen of the apocalypse, making an appearance. Instead, women globally said no to business as usual, while  Michelle Obama’s face captured the emotion most of the world was feeling and almost broke the internet.

So what comes next? As we slip past the euphoria of New Year. The weird detox programs have started to lose its appeal, you feel at odds with the normal chants of hustle to you break.  And you have ditched the ideas that you most do it the way everyone is. You are now ready to get down to the business of making 2017 work for you.

A friend recently posted a video about minding your own business or as I love to call it minding your own lane, the first thing you have to ditch in 2017 is the idea that you are in competition with anyone, the only woman you have to be better than is the one you were yesterday. Leave the comparison sickness to a minimum by ditching the social media stalking, note all you are getting to see even if they are claiming unfiltered hashtags are their showreel, not the blood sweat and tears it took to get there.

Make goals that spark the very core of you,  not just focus on the business goals,  2017 is about having fun as well what have you secretly wanted to try? Is it that ariel yoga class or learning the tango or becoming a nude model for a still drawing class?

Your goals need to be personal to you, create a vision board that highlights every area of your life. Put your own personal picture in that vision board smack bang in the middle of that board. 2017 is about you taking center stage in your own time to be your own leading lady.

What does your leading lady need? Is it that weekend away, the time to take care of your body and soul, maybe it is you unplugging and spending time with people that celebrate all of you? To make this year rock, look at upgrading what you do and who you surround yourself with.

Get active in 2017 regardless on what side of the pond you are. Find a way to get involved. You may have participated in the women’s marches that happened around the world or you didn’t – you can still get involved in activities that would help other women around the world, like supporting and donating to programs and causes that help women make informed choices about their reproductive rights, like Suzyknew! for starts. Or, you could bring a bunch of friends together to collect sanitary products and donate them to women’s shelters and homeless women across your city.

2017 will be what you make of it, and you have the power to choose how your year will end.

Show host: www.shineoutloud.tv

www.twitter.com/lillianogbogoh

Instagram- LillianOgbogoh

 

Clips And Pics From The Women’s March On Washington Including Aggression By Trump Supporters

Ladies (and Gents!), did we show unity at the Women’s Marches all around the world – or did we show some unity?!

For those of you who had the good fortune to attend the Women’s March on Washington or one of the 673 sister marches held in the U.S. and around the world, congratulations! You made history, and we are geared up for the resistance and fight for women’s reproductive health rights – as well as democracy and civil rights. For everyone else (as well those who attended the marches), here are some short video clips and pictures capturing the day.

It all started full on at 8:30 am with a big crowd. SuzyKnew! was less than a block away from the stage at 3rd and Independence, SW with little room to move.

Many signs were about protecting and advancing women’s reproductive health and choice – keeping tiny hands off of women’s lady parts. 

However there were many signs were about democracy, Russia’s interference into the 2016 elections, and many concerns about Trump’s many lies.

Throughout the day there was music and positive sisterhood – and “humankind”hood.

These protestors on stilts dance to “Push It!

As protestors passed by Trump Hotel, many paid their respects.

All and all, it was an  uplifting and invigorating day. The only downside was when passing Trump supporters aggressively snatched our SuzyKnew! poster from us.  No worries. Your lady SuzyKnew! went back and grabbed back our SuzyKnew! poster.

March on, ladies!  And, keep it about unity.

A Soundtrack For Your Body – By F. N.

How many orgasms do you want in 2017? Which guy or girl do you have your eye on, who — you swear on your grandmother’s grave — this year you will find the courage to make a move on? Which sexual adventures are on your 2017 calendar? Don’t tell me you don’t know. Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about it. Girl, it’s the start of a new year. You’re reflecting, you’re resolutioning, you’re planning and starting to execute. You’ve made a list of your goals and plans and you are full of hope and verve. Everything you didn’t get to do this past year, that has remained important to you, you are determined to do this year. You want to buy a house, you want to go back to school, you want to go on a trip, you want to get a promotion, you want to improve the relationship you’re in, you want to evolve spiritually, the list goes on and on.

It is a testament to how little we women prioritize our sexual pleasure that most of us, with this long to-do list for the new year, have neglected to apply our innate planning and go-getting skills to our sexual and reproductive lives. That stops now. 2017 is going to be the year in which we connect the most deeply with our bodies and our sexual identities. We will ask for what we want, we will advocate for our health, we will come to love our bodies, we will say goodbye to all the things that hold us back from solace and pleasure, we will get closer to having and being everything we deserve. Y’all better say Amen, now. Good. Amen rightbackatcha.

Last year I mentioned building a pleasure chest, an arsenal of all your favorite things where sex is concerned. A mental collection of all the things that make you feel like your best sexual self. We already talked about the quest for the ultimate condom. Now we’re going to move on to something even more important: what you use to set the mood and to keep it going.

For most of us it’s music. Whether we’re with a partner or just having quality time with our battery-operated-boyfriends, having something we love playing in the background can make what we’re doing feel a hundred times better. Music can make you feel more connected to the person you’re with because you’re both interacting with something outside of yourselves but doing it together. It can help break the ice because hearing something raunchy or ridiculous come out of R. Kelly’s mouth can make you both giggle or raise an eyebrow. The lyrics can give you ideas about how to make things more interesting. Music can mellow you out and bring this slow sensuality into the room. It can also introduce a sense of romance and caring and desire and passion and magic into the whole shebang. If you’re not a music person then sadly this pow-wow is not for you (I’ll be sure to holla at you later about something you find relevant to your pleasure chest) but if you are like me and music matters to you then it is of utmost importance that you figure out what music improves your ambience and experience and start collecting it in a playlist. Keep this playlist handy and use it whenever you need to, whether you’re flying solo or on a magic carpet with Aladdin.

I am a believer in the music matching the mood so I don’t just have the slow stuff that helps the seduction, I have foreplay stuff for when things are heating up, slow stroke stuff for when the action is starting, gittin’ it music for when I’m riding or being ridden, skin-tingling stuff for when I get to the promised land, and then afterglow music for when we’re lying there in a warm blanket of pleasure. I like words so a lot of the songs say things that are relevant to the action but some of them just have unbeatable tempos that force you to move your hips. Some of them, particularly the afterglow ones, say all the things you would say if you had the energy to lift your head and form coherent sentences.

I used to call my playlist “babymakin’ musiq” because it had a lot of the “let’s look into each other’s eyes as we make love” stuff but when I was creating a list of my sex goals for 2017 and then itemizing the things that would help me achieve those goals I realized “babymakin’ musiq” only covers a small spectrum of the full ride I want my 2017 sex playlist to take me on. So I made a new playlist for the pleasure chest. I added some new songs I had come to love recently and took out some of the ones that had gotten cheesy or I had had sex to too often to find compelling anymore. It’s arranged in order from top to bottom to cover all the phases of the experience. I call my 2017 playlist “from hello to bellow to mellow.” Hopefully something on it will work for your own pleasure chest and, more importantly, help you figure out the songs you need to collect for the one you create. Enjoy.

  1. For Lover’s Only – Maxwell
  2. Table for Two – Joe
  3. Lovers and Friends – Lil’ Jon & The Eastside Boyz ft. Usher and Ludacris
  4. Until Then (I Imagine) – Jill Scott
  5. Come Smoke My Herb – Me’Shell Ndegeocello
  6. Turn Your Lights Down Low – Bob Marley ft. Lauryn Hill
  7. Rocket – Beyoncé
  8. Till The Cops Come Knockin’ – Maxwell
  9. Cruisin’ – D’Angelo
  10. You’re My Fantasy – Robin Thicke
  11. Shhh – Tevin Campbell
  12. Sure Thing – Miguel
  13. Seconds of Pleasure – Van Hunt
  14. With You – Marsha Ambrosius
  15. Say Yes – Floetry
  16. Kissing You – Des’ree
  17. Half On a Baby – R. Kelly
  18. Good Enough – Bobby Brown
  19. Motivation – Kelly Rowland ft. Lil Wayne
  20. Slow & Sexy – Shabba Ranks ft. Johnny Gill
  21. House Call (Your Body Can’t Lie to Me) – Maxi Priest ft. Shabba Ranks
  22. Leave It to Me – Shaggy
  23. Beg Yuh a Fuck – Vybz Kartel
  24. Mr Eazi – Rotate Sketch
  25. Watch n’ Learn – Rihanna
  26. Good Kisser – Usher
  27. Buttons – Pussycat Dolls
  28. Dirty Diana – Michael Jackson
  29. Touch It – Monifah
  30. Gimme – Jill Scott
  31. Ripopgodazippa – Prince
  32. The Heat – Toni Braxton
  33. Rock The Boat – Aaliyah
  34. Giving Him Something He Can Feel – En Vogue
  35. Brown Sugar – D’Angelo
  36. Brown Skin – India Arie
  37. Ingele – Somi
  38. Whatever – Jill Scott
  39. Sandwich and A Soda – Tamia
  40. Late Nights and Early Mornings ­ – Marsha Ambrosius
  41. After We Make Love – Whitney Houston
  42. Let’s Do It Again – Lynden David Hall

Your playlist doesn’t have to be this long or this R&B heavy. It doesn’t have to have explicit or suggestive lyrics (though I would advise not fucking to Kim Burrell or Shirley Caesar). It doesn’t have to contain stages. There are no rules for a pleasure chest. The only thing I insist on is that you start building one. Okay, chile? Don’t make me come find you this 2017.

F.N. is a thirty something Ghanaian free-lance writer who alternates between living in Accra and Washington, DC.

Join SuzyKnew! At The Women’s March On Washington,January 21

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day! Yes, today is the actual birthday of Martin Luther King Jr. To honor King’s memory and fight for reproductive health and women’s rights, join SuzyKnew! at the upcoming Women’s March on Washington, DC. The march will take place this coming Saturday, January 21 in Washington, DC.

The Women’s March on Washington is expected to be one of biggest protests in U.S. history. Click here to register for the March and receive updates. There will be sister marches all over the country. What’s the goal of the march? Click here for about the different women’s and civil rights groups that have come together to organize the march and their mission and values.

We’re not wearing pink pussyhats. But, we will be carrying signs. Friday, January 20 (Inauguration day) we will make signs. Email SuzyKnew@suzyknew.com if you would like a sign made for you.

We’ll meet at third and Independence, SW at 9 am, one hour before the march starts. We’ll also get together later in evening at 8 pm at Hyattsville, MD Busboys and Poets.

https://www.yelp.com/biz/busboys-and-poets-hyattsville-2

5 New Year’s Resolutions That Will Improve Your Sex Life – By Dr. Drai

Hi #GYNEGirls, #Preggos, AND #GENTs. I have missed you. It’s me- Dr. Drai your fav OBGYN. I know 2016 is over so I want to spill some #MedicalT for you real quick. Are you ready? Here are my 5 tips that will improve your sex life for 2017. It’s about SEX. #Juicy

Tip #1 Having more SEX will actually help you lose weight. I know weight loss is at the top of your list for the new year right?

Tip #2 Get a copy of Kama Sutra. Be adventurous with your NEW partner. Hey NOW! Sex already reduces stress. Promise ME- No more stress in the new year.

Tip #3 Stamina increases with exercise. Get to the GYM now. Pump iron & do yoga. PUMP IT. PUMP It. PUMP It. Hunni it’s all about being flexible.

Tip #4 Wanna have energy in the new year? Eat right & keep “IT” tight. A healthy diet consisting of lots of protein, little carbs, lots of fiber and water are a must. Don’t forget the Kegels.

Tip #5 Get some rest to be your best. Having enough sleep improves it all- improves mood, increases energy, helps you lose weight, improves your sex drive. Chile Sleep keeps your hormones in check.

See #GYNEGirls, #Preggos, & #GYNEGirls It’s easy to combine your sex life with your total wellness. Okay now I’m about to miss a plane so I gotta go. Love ya’ll. Remember Exercise, Eating Healthy, Sleeping well all lead to a SEXY and NEW you in the NEW year.

Call Senate Judiciary Committee Members To Tell Them To Vote Against Anti-Women’s Rights, Anti-Civil Rights Jeff Sessions’ Confirmation

Ladies, SuzyKnew! has been trying to tell you since the U.S.election season began that we’ve got to stay woke during these coming days, weeks – and yes, years.  If we don’t, our reproductive health rights – along with our civil rights – will be snatched away from right up under us. Trump and the U.S. Congress are moving fast and furious to block our access to reproductive healthcare and our basic civil and human rights we have been taking for granted (and trying to move forward) all these years.

Jeffery Beauregard Sessions, III  (Yas, ladies, that’a confederate name. This man was named after his Daddy who was named after his Daddy who was named after the confederate president and leader Jefferson Davis. So, you know what we’re dealing with…) will be up for confirmation for Attorney General by the Senate Judiciary Committee this coming Tuesday and Wednesday, January 10 – 11. In his time as senator, this man has voted against every bill advancing reproductive health and abortion care not to mention bills that would protect minorities and women against employment discrimination or voting to prevent family planning providers access to funding to combat Zika. This man is such bad news, 1,140 faculty members of prominent law schools came out opposing his nomination, and last week NAACP members in Alabama were arrested after conducting a sit-in in his Mobile office to get the man’s nomination withdrawn.

Sessions is known to associate with anti-immigration extremists, favor a registry for Muslims, and oppose gay marriage.  There are so many red flags around Sessions, it’s impossible to capture them all here.  Thirty years ago, Sessions was denied an appointment as a federal judge because he was felt to be too racist even for conservatives during the Reagan era. But, now it looks like he stands a good chance of getting confirmed.

But, if you, your friends and others take 2 minutes and call Senators on the Senate Judiciary Committee as well as your congressional representatives, we can block Jeff’s confirmation a la Michael Moore’s rapid response.

Click here: for the members of the Senate Judiciary Committee, here for Senators’ telephone numbers.

You can say something as simple as “I am calling to urge you to vote against Jeff Sessions’ confirmation because of his decades long record of opposing women’s reproductive health rights and civil rights of minorities, immigrants and the gay community.”  If you’re talking to a congressman who represents your area, you can add at the end, “as my representative, if you don’t vote against Sessions’ confirmation, I will mobilize my community to unseat you.”

 

Jeff Sessions’ photo courtesy of TownHall.com

 

Most And Least Read SuzyKnew! Articles In 2016

In 2016, SuzyKnew! continued to bring you action-packed articles on sex, love, contraception and “rock-n-roll” for lovely ladies of color. Before jumping into 2017, we want to remind you of all the articles you loved in 2016. Take a look and enjoy them one more time. We also want to give you a chance to reconsider reading the articles that were not so widely read.

MOST READ ARTICLES:

Painful Sex       I Want To Get Married But I Can’t Give Up My Boo – ASK JANICE

 

My Body of Evidence

What Does Formation Say About Black Women’s Sex Lives – ASK A SEX THERAPIST

 

LEAST READ ARTICLES

The Problem With Period Trackers

                     Black Girls Rocked The Olympics.  But, Are They Rocking Their Love Lives?

SuzyKnew! Finds High ‘Morning After Pill’ Prices And Few Black People In Zurich

 

 

 

 

 

 

10 Myths About Contraception

Ladies, how much do you know about contraception? It’s something we learn about or teach ourselves, but is awareness around sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy really as common as we think?

So, what are the myths making folks hesitate from getting protected? Here are 10 myths about contraception.

‘I can’t get pregnant when breastfeeding’ – breastfeeding can postpone ovulation but this is not always the case, if you don’t want to get pregnant, make sure you use another birth control method that is appropriate for breast feeding women.

‘He can use a balloon if we don’t have a condom’ – these can easily break or tear, they won’t fit correctly, and they don’t have spermicide. Condoms are designed to fully protect you from diseases and prevent sperm reaching the cervix (your lady cave), the above methods will not do this.

‘My man can pull out before climax’ – some sperm can be released before climax, causing you to get pregnant, this ‘withdrawal’ method also doesn’t protect against sexually transmitted diseases.

‘The contraceptive pill is effective as soon as you take it’ – this is not always the case, some women must complete a full cycle before the hormones in the pill work with the body’s hormones to stop ovulation.

‘There’s only two main methods of contraception – the pill & condoms’ – while these are the most common types, there are actually 15 methods of contraception in the USA and UK, all available via  the NHS In the UK.

‘Wearing two condoms is a safe bet’ – Actually, wearing two condoms can increase the risk of them splitting or breaking. If you’re using them correctly, condoms are 95% (female) and 98% (male) effective.

‘The pill can only be taken for a limited period’ – the contraceptive pill can be taken from puberty through to menopause, with no change in its effectiveness.

‘The pill causes cancer’ – the pill actually protects against ovarian and endometrial cancer, which can continue for 15 years (or more) after you stop taking it. That said, studies show that breast cancer is slightly more common in women that use/have used combined oral contraceptives (COCs) in the past ten years against other women. However, there is no proof of direct cause – the cancer may have been there and just found earlier with COC users. Whether you’re on a COC or not, it’s important to be breast cancer aware and regularly check your breasts for changes.

‘Condoms make sex unenjoyable and can cause premature ejaculation’ – it is a myth that condoms constrict an erect penis, causing an early climax. If you’re worried about decreased sensation with a condom, using a textured or ultra-thin condom, as well as lubrication can help with stimulation, while keeping you safe from STDs and pregnancy.

‘Using the contraceptive pill can make it harder to get pregnant after you stop’ – COCs do not cause you to become infertile, and actually, some of its protective benefits (preventing pelvic inflammatory disease, endometriosis, and ectopic pregnancy) can actually preserve fertility. There’s also no proof that fertility is delayed after the pill is stopped. But, SuzyKnew! often reports on natural methods and fertility-based awareness methods for women who want to use non-hormonal contraception.

These common contraception myths could be potentially harmful if you’re not correctly protecting yourself. This is particularly true for men and women worldwide, especially in places where contraception is a taboo – but can you spot the truths from the lies? Test your knowledge with charity Plan UK’s Quiz on some of the contraception myths circulating the world today.

Sources: http://www.webmd.com/sex/birth-control/birth-control-contraceptive-myths

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/contraception-myths-the-withdrawal-method-the-morning-after-pill-and-period-sex-9810054.html

http://www.sexualityandu.ca/birth-control/birth-control-myths

http://www.talkchoice.co.uk/myths

http://www.ippf.org/blogs/myths-and-facts-about-male-condoms

http://www.ippf.org/blogs/myths-and-facts-about-contraceptive-pill

How To Deal With A Trumped-Up Christmas – SIZZLE WITH SOPHIA

Happy Holidays, SuzyKnew! Readers!

It’s been a long year, hasn’t it?  While the Holidays are a great time to reflect on the year that’s passed, it’s more important than ever to prepare for the one that’s coming.

That Grinch, 2016, may have taken Prince, Phife Dawg, and Muhammad Ali.  And 2016 may have given us a rabid, immature, racist/sexist with tiny hands and bad hair as POETUS.  But what we not gon’ do is sit around and wallow in despair!

We need to turn our outrage into REAL activism, because if ever there was a time to put our Black Girl Magic to use, it’s now.  We’ve got work to do, y’all!

I’m not just talking about keyboard activism, either.  Not that there’s anything wrong with using social media to bring attention to the issues that impact our communities.  I respect the power of the keyboard.  I’ve seen how rousing, social justice reform manifestos born by the light of a laptop screen and fueled by too much caffeinated angst can be effective.

But we gotta do more, ladies!  Take that despair you felt when you woke up on November 9th and harness it into real, boots-on-the-ground action in 2017!  Let’s go!

I know what you’re thinking.  You already have so much to do, how can I possibly ask you to do more?  Especially when it’s not even our fault that fool got elected!

“Sophia,” you’re saying.  “94% of us (Black women) acted like we had some damn sense at the polls.  Go ask the 53% of white women or the 18% of Black men who voted for that orange buffoon to do the work!  Leave us alone!  We’re tired!”

I hear you, Sister.  I know you’ve got to focus on keeping your job cuz your snitch-ass co-worker is always clocking your breaks, and running to your asshole boss who’s way too stupid to be making THAT much more money than you.  I know you’ve got kids and family that need your undivided attention.  I know you’re already doing so much with your church or favorite charity.

But listen.  If we don’t make it our business to be heavily involved in shaping the opposition to the horrible changes that are sure to come, we’re all DOOMED!

Think about it.  No one else has OUR backs.  We can’t depend on white feminists because, to quote the late, great Bebe Moore Campbell, their blues ain’t like ours.  Sure, we can work together, but until they understand genuine intersectionality, we’re on our own.

I love my Brothas fiercely, but let’s be real.  They ain’t really been holding us down like we hold them down.  They’ll march, speechify, preach, and rally when the issue is centered on them.  But for issues that specifically affect US – crickets.  Black men, before y’all get in your feelings and listing all the good shit you do for your moms, wives, and daughters, look at the facts.  Y’all can write 2,000 word, thesis-quality think pieces on police violence against Black men or anything sports related, but when it comes to calling out toxic masculinity, rape culture, or domestic violence?  Suddenly you can’t even spell hashtag.  That may hurt to read, but it hurt even more to write.  Brothas, y’all got some work to do in 2017, too.

Ladies, clearly we have to look out for ourselves.  But where to start?  There are so many urgent issues, like rape/sexual assault, repro rights, voting rights, hunger/food insecurity, and health care, just to name a few.  These issues affect all Black people, but especially Black women.  They’re all urgent, so how do we prioritize?  Where does our 2017 activism begin?

I’ve got a list for you!  Here’s how you can prepare for the war years ahead, cuz make no mistake – we are at war:

  1. Focus: Pick one issue. You can’t do it all, so choose one issue where your particular skills set or experience can be of most use.  Yes, we need soldiers, but we need generals, too.  We need leaders and experts to demand a seat at the tables where these issues are addressed, and they need to be qualified.  If that’s you, go for it.  Unable to commit to leadership?  No problem.  We still need soldiers!
  2. Don’t Reinvent The Wheel: I’m not asking you to go start up a new Black Lives Matter Movement, or anything. We don’t want to compete with or draw precious resources away from organizations who are already doing good work.  Instead, research groups in your area that address the issue you chose, and join their efforts.  Go to meetings.  Volunteer for committees.  If there’s a vacuum in your area, then by all means, take whatever steps to fill it. But if the infrastructure is already in place, share your talents with them.
  3. Do The Research: You may have some expertise or experience working on your issue, but you don’t know everything. Take the time to get up-to-date on your issue.  Research local, state and national policy.  Learn new trends.  Investigate the latest scientific research.  Dig deeper than Wiki or mainstream media.  Keep learning.
  4. Donate Money: Money makes the world go ‘round! These organizations desperately need funds to operate and remain relevant.  Give what you can, as often as you can.  But do your research, though.  Make sure you give your dollars to legitimate organizations, only.
  5. Raise Awareness: Stay vocal about your issue! Issues that face Black women, in particular, are often ignored by mainstream media.  Utilize your social media platforms, leverage your network and connections, and do your part to spread the word.
  6. Re-activate Your Membership: You probably already belong (or used to belong) to an organization or group that’s doing good work. Maybe you got busy, had a kid, moved … whatever … you’re just not actively or financially involved anymore.  2017-2021 are not the years to sit on the sidelines, ladies.  Go pay those dues and re-activate your membership in whatever group you used to ride hard for, and get busy.  They need you.  They need your time, talents and your money.

Remember, even if you focus on one issue, you can and should still support the other issues that affect us.  Get busy, but don’t over-extend yourself.  The next four years are going to be a marathon, not a sprint.  Pace yourself.  Practice self-care.  And get to work!

In the meantime, Happy Holidays!  Whomever, however and wherever you celebrate, I wish you love, peace, joy and lots of good sex (had to throw that in there)!

~Sophia

Photo Credit: fierceforBlackwomen.com