Author Archives: SuzyKnew!

About SuzyKnew!

SuzyKnew! is dedicated to improving the sexual and reproductive health and sexual pleasure of women of color.

Ambitious, Overachieving Women Have the Best Sex

Yep, achieving couples have the most satisfying sex.

There is a legend—an accepted legend but a legend nonetheless—that strong-headed, career-focused women are very difficult to please in the head, heart and baby-makers. Some combination of stress, perfectionism and immaculately kempt hair (periodically in a bun so tight that it makes changing facial expressions nigh impossible) make us think that she hasn’t been properly rogered in eons and would probably be a drill sergeant in the sack. As it turns out, common knowledge is mad wrong

by Tom Miller

Ambitious Overachieving Women Have Best Sex

Embarrassed about on-line dating? Don’t be. Join the club. Read the article below to find out why

Online dating: brave new world or future fail how fast should a relationship go? How slow?  Look at this popular site to find some answers.

Red light, green light – long term relationship

ASK AN OBGYN: How Can I Safely Date an HIV+ Man?


Dr. I Roger has been practicing medicine and helping women and their families in Canada and overseas for over 15 years.  Dr. Roger invites you to ask your women’s health questions at

Question: Dear SuzyKnew Obgyn, I’m in love!  But, my new man has HIV/AIDS. How I can get sexy with him but stay safe.  I know about condoms but any suggestions on what to do to make sure we’re really safe?

Response: Congratulations on your new love! I’m happy for you!

Condoms are the most effective method for preventing transmission of HIV infection and other STDs, and you should use one whenever you are sexual.   HIV can be transmitted to you through any fluid coming from the penis of your partner: sperm or seminal fluid (the seminal fluid is the clear secretion coming from the fully erected penis before ejaculation). Therefore, you should roll the condom on to the penis before it comes in contact with your rectum or vagina.  HIV can also be
transmitted while performing oral sex, but the risk is very low.  To be really safe  avoid getting semen in your mouth, or use a condom

Instructions on how to use the condom  comes inside the pack, and if you follow the guidelines the chance of failing is low If something goes wrong with the condom you should contact your physicians  within 72 hours (3 days) and discuss post exposure prophylaxis (PEP). PEP is a treatment that may prevent HIV infection and involves taking anti-HIV drugs for 4 weeks Not all HIV clinics will have PEP, and you should identify  where the service could be provided to you ahead of time. You can also discuss emergency contraception (ECP) with your provider to avoid an unwanted pregnancy.

ASK AN OBGYN is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.

Find an obgyn

Need an obgyn?  Want one who is reputable but don’t know where to look?  Let SuzyKnew do the work for you. Below are links from not-for-profit obgyn associations to find obgyns in the USA, UK, South Africa and beyond. 

USA – American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG)

UK, Canada, and Australia –  Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (RCOG) in these countries may be good references for finding obgyns. Also, you can try

South Africa and other countries– Marie Stopes International Clinics

Other countries – Marie Stopes International Clinics international list

Also, Our Bodies Ourselves is a good resource for informatio on sexual and reproductive health:


Abortion is the termination of pregnancy. If you chose to have an abortion, it is called an “induced” or “elective”  abortion.  In the UK, South Africa, India and other English-speaking countries the procedures are often referred to as TOPs or Termination of Pregnancy.  It’s easiest and safest to have this procedure within the first 3 months from your last menstrual period.   So, the earlier you decide the easier it will be.  You can opt for an outpatient procedure with local anesthesia.  The procedure can be scheduled in advance and you can be back to work or home within an hour or so. You can also ask your health care provider for medication.  Medication requires at least two visits to the clinic or doctor’s office, and your uterus is evacuated over the course of a day or two. In other words, you’ll experience heavy bleeding and cramping as the uterus contracts.  Some women find the outpatient procedure more convenient while others feel that medication is “more natural.”  Chose what is best for you.

Medically speaking, an abortion can also be “spontaneous” or happen on its own. Health providers will call this a spontaneous abortion. Your sister and your friends will refer to this as a “miscarriage” or “losing the baby.”  Whether you chose to have an abortion or if nature decides for you, abortions and miscarriages can be emotionally challenging.  Also, some family and friends will be really supportive while others you thought you could count on or understand you suddenly disappoint you. Make sure you get the support you need.

What to do if you’re considering an abortion or think you’re having a miscarriage??  In the US, you can look for a Planned Parenthood and in the UK contact Bpas.  In other countries, look for Marie Stopes International clinics or MSI.  For miscarriages, you can call your obygn, and if you don’t have one try SuzyKnew!Find an obgyn.


Is this the fifth time you’ve passed by an adorable tyke grinning toothlessly at you in the grocery story and your heart thumps with yearning…? Sleeves rolled up and already working on getting pregnant? Or you’re not quite there yet and you just wanna know more about pregnancy? Then check out the websites below.

Learn more about your options. if you’re in the United States

And if you’re hanging out in the UK, looking at this site will dish the nitty-gritty:

But, ladies, whether you’re just starting out or you feel like it’s your last chance, it’s never too late to explore and get acquainted with the whys and hows of pregnancy. Wanna know how other women are doing and dealing with it? Follow women as they try fertility treatments and embark on the exciting world of pregnancy.