Most of the time, when we hear the words sensuous and sensual, there is an immediate assumption to it meaning sexual. Most people can’t be blamed for this line of thinking. Merriam-Webster defines sensuality as “Relating to or consisting in the gratification of the senses or the indulgence of appetite.” While Oxford defines it as “Of or arousing gratification of the senses and physical, especially sexual, pleasure.”
Sensuality is a state of being where you live from your awaken senses. You can make the mundane & ordinary sensual without the act of sexuality being involved. As a woman who is celibate, sensuality is not off limits to you. In fact, it is your birthright and a divine act of self-love and cannot be taken from you nor does it require another person to activate it in your life.
This assumption that sensuality and sexuality mean the same thing has caused a lot of women, especially faith based women to shy away from their own sensuality fearing it to be lascivious and carnal. Fearing that being a sensuous woman is just one step away from being a Scarlet woman. This could not be further from the truth; as in the true definition of sensuality is about living from your fully awakened senses as a way of being while sexuality is the physical act of sex.
So how can you be sensual and celibate? First, you need to change your mindset; stop thinking about sensuality in terms of sexuality and sex. Yes, sensuality can make your sex life more pleasurable, however let’s shed some light on this. Sensuality is about living from your senses that are your taste, sight, smell, feeling and hearing. There are so many activities in life that are sensual that have absolutely nothing to do with sex. Like the simple pleasures of, indulging in a great massage, eating a tasty meal, feeling the touch of silk brushing against your skin, dipping strawberries in chocolate, or even turning up your favorite song thus allowing the music to fully move you and just dance. Enjoy the day you’re in and look around you. Get out into the park, and walk among the roses, take pleasure in the ordinary from sharing that giggly chat with your friends, reading that book, indulging in that delicious cup of coffee. Take the time notice the world around you learning to live in the moment allows you to take full sensory notice of the world around you.
Taking the time to be present is another sure fire way to kick start your sensuality without sexuality. What do I mean when I write be present? Simply put, this means being able to be in the moment. I apologize for how cliché that sounds. Being present calls for you to enjoy the moment and day you are in, in fact it calls for you to be where you are. Stop listening to the noise in your head or checking off your mental checklist. Make a priority to be present with the people you are with, as well as being present with yourself, this calls for you to listen to what you desire and want. Being fulfilled is the mark of a sensual woman. There are various ways to awaken your sensuous nature; your surrounding can be a sensual haven for you. Create a sensual haven for yourself. This is such a simple way to fully awaken your sensuous nature. Throw out those old sheets and towels. Instead buy ones that feel indulgently grand to use against your skin. Redecorate your sanctuary using colors that bring you pleasure. To make you feel amazing, get a nice shag pile rug that feels luscious to walk on. Create yourself a sanctuary, a haven to retreat to.
Turn inward! It is time to form a deep intimate relationship with your amazing body. It is not being sexual in any way. It is about loving the body you are in. This is about taking full ownership of your body and being comfortable in your own skin. Have you seen those women that just look comfortable at home in their bodies? There is a joy that can be seen by others. Her sensuality is something evident from the way she moves, to how takes care of her body like it is scared even down to how she dresses and feeds herself.
As you can see being a celibate woman does not exclude from the sensual woman club, your sensuality is who you are not what you do. Sex is invariably linked to sensuality however sensuality can exist with sexuality.
I’m Lillian Ogbogoh, as the Sensuality Discovery Specialist I help women to break up with the mind-sets and thoughts that keeps them feeling unfulfilled and invisible in their own lives. Teaching them how to take center stage in their own lives to attract the amazing life they desire.